Relationship in Confinement thumbnail

The Challenge In this post, the second in the Despatches from the Retreat series, we want to look at relationships, particularly intimate relationships, and the potential dynamics between the partners. With the difficulties of COVID-19, these dynamics can be an extra challenge, because many of us are forced to be in closer contact with our [...]

Questioning our Doublethink thumbnail

The Clocks Strike Thirteen It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. So goes the well-known opening sentence of George Orwell’s classic novel 1984. The novel remains a extraordinary description of a future that Orwell feared and, although written in 1949, remains a future that some would say we [...]

Dogs in Dream and Reverie

The Irrepressible Dog Living in the city we see daily the reverence and attention that people give to their dogs. At our nearby harbour-side dog park there’s rich energy – frivolous, wild, serious things happen between the dogs down there (and between their owners!) Despite our lives becoming increasing embedded in the infrastructures of the [...]

Carved wooden monument from Madagascar – Acceptance of Difference

Difference in Counselling and Psychotherapy One of the big themes we see in Counselling and Psychotherapy with both couples and individuals is a difficulty in accepting and dealing with difference, and the conflicts associated with this. This post is a short meditation on difference. Sometimes Masked in Counselling Here are some examples from Counselling that [...]

Tasmania – a Metaphor for Beginnings and Counselling

Triggers Something we’ve found very useful when working with clients is getting them to tune into themselves to understand when they are getting triggered. We use the word “triggered” to identify when someone has an emotional reaction which may be unproductive (and is usually based on old patterns), in any situation, and then acts based [...]

The Storm Passes Over – Wu-Wei and Couple Relationships

Wu-Wei and the Lake Como Storm We awoke one night at Lake Como this (Northern) summer to a powerful storm with endless rolling thunder. The air was lit with bright sheets of lightning, the rain hammered down, and the power in our apartment was cut off. This went on for hours, and all we could [...]

Practice Reflective Listening in your couple relationship to experience and benefit from its subtle and lasting power.

Couple Arguments When couples come to us saying they have communication issues it is usually due to one or two of the following reasons: Real-World Issues: such as differences of opinion on money, family, debt, children, blended families, houses. Attachment Issues. This often shows up in communication as couples fighting about how they fight. The [...]